About Me

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exercise is my medicine. I run, swim, and lift weights anything to keep my body in top form. I am an RN, a mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter and a friend. I am grateful for my life and each new day. My PRs Los Angeles Marathon (March 22, 2010) - 6:00:03 San Diego Rock and Roll Half Marathon (June 6, 2010) - 2:47:53 Redondo Beach Superbowl 10K (Feb 2010) - 1:03 Redondo Beach Superbowl 5K (Feb 2009) - 27:31

Monday, April 11, 2011

epiphany




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the end of things

I get bored or lazy whatever the reason and I have a low level habit of not completing things.

I have been this way forever.

I don't eat the last bite of toast,  don't sip the last gulp of coffee, do not read the the end of a book, leave before a movie is over, get up before a show ends .....it goes on and on. most recently I got a little past mile 23 of 26.2 of the Los Angeles Marathon before I bellied up to the bar at a Starbucks. I am done mentally before it is over. (Probably because I knew I had already finished a marathon the year before it was easier to stop when the winds and rain came).

and this week is the final week of my  Bachelor of Science in Nursing (BSN)
and I have one paper left The Individual Professional Development plan, YAWN!! I am 50 years old my plan is to retire (giggle).


I wrote this and went for a trail run..................here is what I think after an hour of challenging my body on hills......

I do not like the end of things

that is a fact about me.

So what can I do? Simple be present in the moment BE NOW.

I am fine right now. 

around mile 19 of the marathon in the pouring rain a few weeks ago I had a freak out second in my head. I thought crap this is mile 19 I still have a billion more steps to take, I should just forget it. Then I told myself to do a quick personal inventory. After a quick mental survey I noticed that I was fine and concluded that I could keep going. I do hate the end of things. human nature most likely.
So from now on I am always beginning. The moment I am in is the first step the beginning. 
Each day is a new challenge~day #1. I am going to have only day #1 from now.


~no past mess ups to bog me down
~no future mountains to scale
just now this moment.
peace!






3 comments:

Jackie said...

I LOVE this post and the idea of every day being Day #1. Wowza, girlfriend! I'm so much like you - I seldom finish anything. I have boxes full of half-finished books, material cut-out but not sewn, painting half done...on and on. I think you helped me realize that I, too, do not like endings. I like the potential of things and the freshness of "new." When I have finished some things in my life, there was almost a sense of loss - of grieving. But if I think of it as Day #1 --- wow. Love it. Great insight. Hugs, from a mile high.

JW said...

Living in the Now has changed both of our lives, huh? I love this post, and share your thoughts.

Anonymous said...

Practice makes perfect.